Movie Twist Endings # 1

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(Screen shows still of DVD cover.  Andy reads the original ending. Conan will read the twist ending.)

# 1. The Notebook

Premise: An old man (James Garner) entertains an Alzheimer's patient at a nursing home or insane asylum (the movie doesn't really say) by reading her the story of two star-crossed lovers (Rachel McAdams, Ryan Gosling).

Original Ending: The old man reveals to the woman that the story is about their love and the notebook is her diary - he promised to read her the story every day in an effort to elongate her moments of clarity. (Okay, but he could probably just record his voice one time and play it for her while he goes to the dog track.)

Conan Twist Ending:
It turns out that the woman doesn't really have Alzheimer's; she doesn't remember their love because she never really met the guy. James Garner just goes around to retirement homes and reads from his "notebook" in an effort to sleep with as many women as possible. He is arrested and charged with 300 rapes.

# 2. ET

Aliens travel across several galaxies to examine... our plant life. Either as a pretty good practical joke or because he has hygiene issues, the other aliens leave ET (Sandra Oh) to fend for himself on Earth. While ET desperately tries to "phone home" for a pick-up, he befriends Elliot(actor not important).

Original Ending:
Despite their budding romance, Elliot decides to help ET find his way home, and both learn the value of true friendship in the process.

Conan Twist Ending: When ET finally "phones home," he triggers an alien invasion that results in the destruction of humanity.

Iconic moment: Seconds before the aliens arrive with weapons of destruction, Elliot makes a last ditch effort to connect with ET by extending his index finger. In response, ET gives Elliot the middle finger and laughs as he watches his alien friends fire bomb the neighborhood.

# 3. Home Alone

Premise: What but hi-jinx could ensue when burglars try to break into your house and kill the son you accidentally left there while you went on vacation? Just ask Kevin McCallister (Macauley Culkin). He not only prevents the bumbling burglars from breaking into his house, he is a leader in discovering new and exciting ways to inflict pain on men's crotches.

Original Ending: The family rushes back to find Kevin, and vows to appreciate their son. Sounds like a lesson parents shouldn't have to learn; if you already know not to abandon your child, then simply watch for the crotch-hitting.

Conan Twist Ending: It turns out the Dad is mired in financial problems and hired the burglars to burn down the place for insurance money. He didn't forget Kevin, he wanted one less mouth to feed. Final shot of the movie is Culkin slapping his hands to his face as he sees his father approach him with a loaded shotgun.

# 4. Back to the future (1985)


Story: Marty McFly (Michael J. Fox) accidentally travels back in time only to find himself embroiled in a love triangle with... his parents.
Original Ending: Marty makes it back to the future, but not before teaching his Dad the all-important lesson that violence is never the right answer unless you're really, really good at it.
Conan Twist Ending: Michael J. Fox's character sleeps with his mom, stays in the past and makes a living by recording Chuck Berry's music years before they originally were released. Chuck Berry commits suicide.

# 5. Sleepless in Seattle (1993)

Story: Sam Baldwin (Tom Hanks) is so bereft after losing his wife that his son seeks the advice of a radio psychologist. After hearing his story, Annie (Meg Ryan) spends the rest of the movie stalking him in an effort to win him over.
Original Ending: Sam and Annie meet atop the Empire State building and start what we think we will be the second great love of a lifetime based entirely upon their mutual attraction.

Conan Twist Ending: Annie finds out that Tom Hanks' character's first wife was murdered... by Tom Hanks. In the final scene, Sam pushes her off the Empire State Building. When questioned by police, claims it wasn't him but "magic."

# 6. Twelve Angry Men (1957)


Story: During a murder trial, a dissenting juror (Henry Fonda) slowly convinces his fellow jurors that the case is not as simple as it at first appeared.

Original Ending: Despite the mountain of circumstantial evidence linking the kid to the murder of his father, the dissenting juror (Henry Fonda) finally convinces all of the men to acquit the young man citing reasonable doubt.

Conan Twist Ending: After his acquittal, the accused kid and the dissenting juror (Henry Fonda) track down all of the jurors, rob them, and stab them in the face with their matching knives. They bring the money to their gang headquarters.

# 7. Terminator (1984)

Story: An unstoppable cyborg is sent from the future to kill Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton) before she can give birth to the future leader of human race.

Original Ending: Sarah Connor (Hamilton) destroys the Terminator and lives to give birth to the future leader of the robot resistance.

Conan Twist Ending: Epilogue reveals that John Connor's future vision includes ethnic cleansing. The terminators only wanted to preserve the peaceful society they had created.

# 8. Airbud (1997)

Story: A young boy and a stray dog with fantastic basketball skills become instant friends on the court and off.

Original Ending: AirBud leads the team to victory; the boy becomes a local hero

Conan Twist Ending: After failing to properly box out, the opposing team steals the ball and scores. In frustration, Air Bud mauls the opposing team's coach. After the team is charged with a technical foul, Air Bud is taken out back and put to sleep.

Bonus Twist: After being shot, it's revealed that Air Bud was really Joy Behar. Town rejoices.